Wednesday, June 11, 2014

When Yuck Happens with Fellow Christians


The situation has been boiling for a while.  Basically from the beginning the hot flame has been heating up the relationship.  I knew we were in trouble when the person said in a judgmental tone, "Yes, I know who you are.  You are _____'s [Little Man] mom."  An opinion had been made about me without any understanding of what we have been through with our severe ADHD son. 

It culminated a few days ago and within moments my integrity and honor were drug through the mud.  A God-given passion was belittled.  A spiritual gift and degree was made trivial. It cut like a knife and I struggled to remove my emotions from the situation. 

Ever feel like this?

The worst thing about it is that all involved are Christians.  Not that Christians are perfect but, shouldn't this be handled better?  Shouldn't there be open and honest communication?  Shouldn't we all be striving for the same goal? 

My soul cried out to God seeking wisdom and understanding for what was happening.  What was my role in all of this?  How should I have handled it differently?  What do I do now? 

The next day I woke up with a desperate heart asking God to give me peace, comfort, and help me know what step to take next.  I turned to Google to lead me to specific verses. 

    Hebrews 12:14
    Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord...

    Romans 12:18
    If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.

"Live peaceably with all men."  This is rough stuff.  A great thought but how do I put it in play? 

    Philippians 2:3
    Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.

    James 3:17-18
    But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy.  Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

The website goes on to say:
The opposite of conceit and selfishness is humility. Humility is necessary to properly deal with difficult people. We want others to be patient with our shortcomings, and we should be patient with theirs. When we strive to make peace, we are exercising humility.
1.  not proud or arrogant; modest
2.  having a feeling of insignificance, inferiority, subservience, etc.
3.  low in rank, importance, status, quality, etc.; lowly: of humble origin
4.  courteously respectful
5.  low in height, level, etc.; small in size:
I'll be honest.  Humility was the furthest from my mind at the heat of the moment. Peace was about as far away. 

The Holy Spirit brought to my mind this verse from Ephesians 6:21.
For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

With this in mind, I suddenly had a different perspective on the situation.  I am not battling a fellow human.  This is a war against God's enemy.  Second, we all have short comings and I need to be patient and merciful to others just as I desire them to be to me. 

Are you in the middle of a yucky situation?  

Maybe the hurt is still present.  God will pour salve on our wounds if you ask. 

Perhaps the fear of others doubting your integrity is real.  God is just.  

Possibly you wonder if God has forgotten about the passion He laid on your heart.  Or maybe you wonder if you misinterpreted His leading.  God holds our gifts and talents in His hands with "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"  (Jeremiah 29:11).

I love that when I am broken I can come to my Daddy and He allows me to crawl into His lap and cry.   He collects each tear (Ps 56:8) and reminds me that He will be my strength and help.

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.   Isaiah 41:10

How about you?  Needing to crawl into God's lap and cry?  His arms are wide. 

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The Our Out-of-Sync Life blog focuses on encouraging women to deepen their spiritual life, simplify daily tasks, and impress Jesus on the children around them.